None of Your Emails Are Finding Me Well | Funny Christmas Candle (ONLINE ORDER ONLY)

Hand-poured locally in the heart of Los Angeles, California, this clean-burning soy candle brings a little laughter (and a lot of peace) to anyone’s desk or home office. Equal parts relatable and ridiculous, it’s a must-have for workplace gifting season.

The Details:
• Size: 12oz | Burn Time: 60+ hours
• Natural Soy Wax for a long, clean burn
• High-Quality Essential Oil Fragrance for rich, lasting scent
• Non-toxic & Cruelty-Free because you deserve better
• Hand-poured locally in Los Angeles, California

CHRISTMAS APPLE PIE 

celebrate the holiday season with the crisp, juicy scent of freshly picked apples, perfectly blended with a hint of warm spice. Bright fruit notes mingle with touches of cinnamon, nutmeg, and clove, creating a fragrance that’s as cozy as a holiday pie fresh from the oven. Whether you're trimming the tree or wrapping gifts, this festive scent brings a nostalgic warmth that feels just like home.

Infused with natural essential oils, including cinnamon, nutmeg, clove, orange, and cedarwood, this is the apple fragrance you didn’t know you needed—but won’t want to celebrate without

Top: Orange Peel, Cinnamon, Nutmeg
Middle: Apple
Base: Clove, Vanilla

HOLIDAY SPICE + VANILLA

 Wrap yourself in the cozy warmth of Christmas with the perfect blend of spicy cinnamon and creamy vanilla. This inviting fragrance captures the sweet nostalgia of holiday baking, filling your home with the comforting scents of freshly baked cookies and cinnamon sticks by the fire. It’s the ultimate way to evoke the joy and magic of the holiday season.

Infused with natural essential oils, including balsam, this festive fragrance is pure Christmas cheer in a jar.

Top: All Spice, Clove, Nutmeg
Middle: Tea Rose, Coconut
Base: Lactonic, Vanilla, White Musk

CINNAMON CYPRESS GLOW:

A classic holiday scent that tells the story of a cozy holiday night spent sipping wine in front of the fireplace.  The essential oils combine orange spice notes from the kitchen, fir and pine notes from the Christmas tree, and an earthy smokiness from the fireplace. It's Christmas Eve, in a bottle, any time.

This fragrance is infused with natural essential oils, including orange, cinnamon, clove, vetiver, and pine.

Top: Orange Peel, Cinnamon, Ginger
Middle: Cypress, Clove
Base: Pine, Fir

SHIMMERING SUGAR COOKIE: 

Dive into the holiday spirit with a joyful blend of sugared red berries, twirling in sweet harmony with rich, buttery vanilla bean. This fragrance is a true festive indulgence, capturing the magic of the season in every swirl. Topped with a playful dash of colorful sequin sprinkles, it’s a fun and sparkling celebration that will leave your space feeling merry and bright.

Top:  Strawberry, Sheer Blueberry Glaze
Middle: Vanilla Bean Swirl,  Raspberries
Base: Sweet, Cream, Musky, Powdery

ORANGE + COCONUT + MUSK

Orange coconut musk opens with juicy orange, melon, and green notes, awakening the senses with vibrant freshness. A heart of mango, coconut, and jasmine brings a tropical, indulgent touch, while amber, musk, and sandalwood add warmth and depth. This fragrance radiates energy and sophistication, ideal for lovers of zesty, tropical, and warm blends.

Top: Orange, Melon, Green
Middle: Mango, Coconut, Jasmine
Base: Amber, Musk, Sandalwood

SEA SALT + ORCHID

You are lying on the beach. Waves crash in the background while the soft, warm breeze brushes against your skin. White curtains dance in the wind. The experience is serene. You smell flowers and a restorative summer freshness, not unlike a wellness temple. “Sea Salt & Orchid” is an elegant blend of floral notes and salty highlights. Soothing hints of jasmine and lily of the valley come to life alongside classic aromas of wood and tonka bean.

Top: Sea Salt, Ozone
Middle: Jasmine, Lily of the Valley, Green Leaves
Base: Wood, Tonka Bean